Christmas is here

for the family that i grew up in, Christmas brought a lot of pain. despite the copious amount of hours my mom put into the season to make it "more" for us, there was a tension that i just didn't understand as a child. as an adult, i can see the hurt and know of the destruction that caused so much pain for my dad and as a result understand why he finds no joy in Christmas at all. words would do no justice to explain the situation and circumstances that surround my dad and the weight that he continues to live under. nor would they touch the effort and number of trees my mom continues to decorate with in order to find the peace we are to celebrate. a dynamic that has made Christmas guarded and excited in the same moment.

but moment begets moment, growth begets growth and so new life comes of an old one, and here we have Christmas in a new family. so with a full heart i give thanks for where i have come from and where we are headed.

the beginnings of Christmas this year brought a new event. the church Christmas play. although i do believe i have never been apart of a more disorganized, and uninformed church event, it went on regardless. and it brought with it a new excitement for the season. though she practiced the song they were to sing forever, and refused to sing on stage, there was a new joy, a look through new eyes at what we are here celebrating.

then snow fell and i felt a wave of peace, a sense of thankfulness in the small things that make up our family, that make up our larger families. and Christmas was here.

so i documented it the only way i know how. these are our humble beginnings.

-sophie, our sheep who stands a good head taller than any other child in the 2-3 year old class-

-found more excitement in the song being over than in the singing of it. when she came off the stage she said to scott, "yeah, i didn't sing, maybe next time".-

-new Christmas pj's from nana-

-a walk outside to enjoy the beauty of the snow-